About Me

My name is Jane Howatt. Welcome to my blog!

For 13 years I rode shotgun with John “Jigsaw” St. John, one of the LAPD‘s most celebrated detectives, as he investigated notorious murder cases.

The collision of this ordinary suburban mom and the underbelly of evil is the subject of my book, “The Killer, the Cop and Me.”

On my blog, I‘ll post about true crime, my life and what I learned from the mind of a brilliant homicide cop.

I invite you to join me for the ride!


The Psychopathic Mind: What Went Wrong?

I invited four friends to my home for an all-out, free-for-all analysis of one aspect of my book: The Killer, The Cop and Me. Our intent was to grapple with the motives, the personality and the psychology of the killer – Bill Bradford.

Included in the group were (1) an actress/screenwriter who had edited portions of my book proposal (2) a writer who had met John St. John and written a screenplay based on the story (3) a PhD neuropsychologist whose area of expertise was psychopathic behavior and (4) another writer working on a memoir. We gathered around the table armed with notepads and a chart and timeline of Bill Bradford’s personal and criminal history.

The basics: Bradford’s aggressive behavior began at age 13 with an assault on a neighbor’s 12 year old daughter. He was counseled and released from custody. Two years later, he was arrested for indecent exposure when he jumped naked out of a tree and tried to grab a girl who was standing under the tree. His descent into a life of unspeakable crimes had begun.

The five of us tossed around plausable explanations for Bradford’s hatred of women. My psychologist friend spoke up, “Bradford killed for release. The tension and conflict inside him would build and build until he was ready to explode. Then he would rape and kill. He would go into a rage that transcended his ego. His character was so fractured he was unable to gain fulfillment or joy or release from his attacks so he needed to destroy all sexuality of his victims – to dehumanize and objectify them – so they would become almost non-human. As his attacks became less rewarding hey became more vicious.”

I asked, “What was he searching for?”

Cheryl thought for a moment than said, “Bradford was searching for the keys that would unlock some emotion, some memory that was good and safe. When he failed to find those needs, he struck out. He struck out again and again until there was no stopping him. That is, until St. John arrested him.”

The depth and tragedy of Bill Bradford and what his victims endured, quieted us.

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